Fresh Roll Goes Here!

In fairness, no one expects a product called "Fresh Roll"
To have particularly clever or good packaging...

Tell Them You Mean Business!

Naturally the best way to win your legal case is to
Hire a lawyer whose very name strikes fear in others...

PROTECT against gunk!

Every year we lose 13,500 Americans to gunk-related incidents...
Don't let gunk make you the next victim.

SHOP 'TIL YOUR MOUSE BREAKS!

Oh to be able to shop with such a fervor!

Before your next meal!

You better do it, you slob!

Give your lover the... Purple Passion Pillow!

Usually I have something witty to say, but words escape me now.
Ok.. let's mention the free shipping! And alliteration!

PROFESSIONALLY INSTALLED!

Look how happy (and clean?) he is working under your car!

LONG Weekends Rule!

70% off the same tired games we've hocked for decades!
Why go outside on a long weekend when you've got an iPad?

FRESH PANTS!

They sell used, crusty pants on those 'other' sites.

The mistress!

This ad is perfectly deplorable.
Also, both women appear to have disembodied heads.

Don't miss this chance to save big!

Spend lots of real money on shitty digital artwork!